March 10 2004

And you don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone

This is something so normal yet annoying in human nature. In most cases we have to lose someone or something to know the value of that person or thing.
We don’t realize how much someone means to us until they’re gone. We don’t appreciate something we posses until it’s lost or destroyed.
When we live with someone, or have a certain kind of relationship that gives us the chance to meet them regularly or hear from them so often, we find ourselves being so positive that they’ll be there forever. It goes without saying, that people automatically feel secure and free of worries when they’re around their beloved ones. And this feeling of security makes them feel free to deal with their beloved ones the way they like. We give ourselves the right of constant complaining, negative criticizing, silly blaming, rude offending, and depressive under-estimating.
How many times a day do you go to work feeling like shit because you can no longer take your roommate’s annoying habits? How many times do you go to school wishing you’ll never have to return back home and see your parents? How many times a day do you complain about your job? How many times a day do you regret getting married or engaged to your partner? How many times do you wish you’ll go back in time to make different decisions and have a “better” life? And how many other times do you wish you’ll skip this period you’re living now and jump into future to forget about your awful past? How many times do you wish and hope and pray?
We always want more open-minded parents, better brothers, better sisters, more trusty friends, more interesting teachers, more loyal employees, more understanding employers, more polite neighbors, richer husbands, sexier fiancé(e)s, cuter kids, a classier neighborhood, a nicer apartment, a bigger house, a newer car, a more modern mobile, more money, more fame, and a better luck.
We forget that we’re not perfect, and that others might be thinking of getting rid of us to replace us with better ones. We take it for granted that we’ll always have the “unsatisfying” amount of money we have now, and that we’ll always get to wake up every morning on the voices of our sisters, the singing of our brothers and the faces of our parents. We’re so sure that we’ll be having a lifetime career, and be around the same colleagues for as long as we’ll live. We never doubt that our partners might be the ones who aren’t happy with us, or that we look ugly to our kids or be disloyal to our friends. We always believe that we’re the best and that others will have to accept us the way we are. We always think of our needs and how to make things better for us. What if the choices we make will hurt the ones around us and make their life worse? Who cares? The whole world is made for us to enjoy the way we want. We’re smarter and more mature than others, we are the ones to rule. They don’t know where their interest actually is, but we know where our interests and theirs are, so we’re the decision makers by default.
But then a day comes when you feel so lonely, so helpless, so lost, and so not in the right place. Only then you’ll realize how stupid you were when you’ve hated who you were once. How dumb you were when you sold the most meaningful parts of your life to afford a fancy you and buy some “this is what I want” crap.
It’s only when it’s impossible to go back that you’d realize how blind you were when you exchanged what’s real with what’s fake. And only then you’ll regret your choices and hate your decisions and start a new series of wishes. Wishes that might come true, and others that might never be fulfilled.
Therefore and before it becomes too late, you have to know how to make a wish, why to make a wish, and for what to wish. When it comes to money never compare yourself with who are richer, look down at the ones who are poorer. And when it’s about other non-financial ambitions, never look down, but look as high as you can. When you want to make a wish, wish for good health, sanity and strength. You need nothing more than those to make your dreams come true and be a better you. Always remember that you’re not perfect, and so are the rest of the world. There will always be ones better than you one way or the other. But there will always be ones who will see you better than them, and ones who’ll see you worse, and ones who’ll see you as equal. Stick to those who love you the way you are, and who’ll advice you when you need help. Learn to compromise, it’s not wrong as long as it wont change your principles and wont hurt your dignity. Never lose hope in improving, but never live on the hope of becoming better. And most important of all, you have to learn to appreciate what you have when you still have it, don’t wait for it to be gone.
Because it is difficult to get along with someone without having problems, but you have to know that it’s more difficult to lose that someone, yet the most difficult thing is to spend your life in regret for not being fair to that someone you lost, and it’s even worse to get used to missing that someone every month, every week, each day, 24 hours, and with every passing minute.
So, here you go: you should know what you’ve got… before you and it are gone!



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Posted March 10, 2004 by Eman Abukhadra in category "Just Personal